Come on, America, you knock-kneed purty little princess. Did you really think you could handle being ruled by a POTUS so potent he grows surplus pubes on his stiff upper lip?
There was Dick Cheney, as always, arguing that the only way to deal with Iran was to bomb it back to 1953. But President George W. Bush, on the unanimous advice of his generals, decided such a campaign would be a disaster—and Cheney began an end run that’s working wonders with today’s top Republicans.
In 2007, folksy war addict Mike Huckabee told Meet the Press viewers that it’s dangerous “to oppose a sitting commander in chief while we’ve got people being shot at on the ground.” But it’s election time! So now, willing Americans, stay out of the military until you have a commander in chief that pleases Huck.
Desperate to stand apart from the pack and court soccer moms with a thirst for waterboarding, future presidential also-ran Marco Rubio staked out a remarkable policy position on day one of his campaign: He'd grow the detainee population at Guantánamo and "aggressively" pump prisoners for intelligence.
History's greatest democracy continued its love affair with hereditary monarchy Wednesday, as Jeb Bush captivated listeners with A Very Important Foreign Policy Speech full of original insights about being his own man and America needing leadership and believing that "weakness invites war … and strength encourages peace."
Jeb Bush, the "smart" one, announced this morning in a tweet and a Facebook post that he is probably running for president in an election that's 693 days from now, and definitely forming a PAC through which you can give him money if you like the idea of him running for president.
