"When hard news people deceive their viewers and readers to advance a political agenda, that's when the nation gets hurt," Fox News Sith lord Bill O'Reilly complained last week, after Brian Williams' high-profile face-plant. But a new report suggests O'Reilly's been similarly flogging a bogus story of military bravado for years.

It's Benghazi redux: As they secured the U.S. embassy in Yemen, the final Marines to leave the country handed their weapons over to Iran-friendly Houthi rebels, on orders from some Obama administration bureaucrat. That's the right-wing blogosphere's story, anyway, even though the Marine Corps calls it bullshit.

Since the time of Archimedes, human history has acknowledged six simple machines, basic tools designed to advance our lots. But in 2014, no tool proved simpler and more efficient in the production of sublimation, denial and self-sustaining garbage than our conservative media. Here were its highest achievements.

A member of the secretive, all-about-the business special operations team that killed Osama bin Laden will participate in an upcoming Fox News Channel documentary and explain how it was him who fired the shots that killed the Al Qaeda leader.

Do you jihad? You're American, right? You're probably a great jihader and you don't even know it. Fox News commenter Dr. Keith Ablow, "forensic psychiatrist and author of thrillers," wants you to unleash your patriotic jihad potential in accordance with his understanding of jihad, which he got from MerriamWebster.com.

Registered voters are interesting.

"And now, for 'My Take™.' So: Should we trust the government to keep us all safe from Ebola?" With these words, Fox News head-on-a-stick Gretchen Carlson offered 56 seconds' worth of historic, Brobdingnagian "Take™," replete with Obamacare IRS Secret Service Benghazi, does she have to spell it out for you.

"Why not just shut down the flights and secure the borders?" Elisabeth Hasselbeck asks about Our Ebola Nightmare on Fox & Friends today. Unfortunately, she asks not a fellow anchor but Dr. Anthony Fauci, Director of the National Institiute of Allergies and Infectious Diseases at the NIH.

It's been a week since "Boobs on the Ground"-Gate. What have we learned? Not enough.

Bill O'Reilly has the spittle of a young soldier and the wattle of an elder statesman, but does he have the intellectual or moral mettle of a war strategist? No. No, he does not.

Seems a fair estimation by "Fox Nation." Not that you could expect much else out of weak latte-saluting eurosocialist Obummer. When will America get the entirely reactionary War with Islam it deserves?

America needs a coherent strategy to deal with the Islamic State in Iraq and Syria. Phil Robertson, that Duck Dynasty dad, makes guns, so maybe he has some ideas. Well, yes, he does, and basically they boil down to America being more like ISIS, only, you know, Christian.